“Once I wanted to kill myself. Not anger – anger made me work harder. Not fear. But disgust, Howard. The kind of disgust that made it seem that the whole world was underwater, and the water stood still….and then I looked at that kitten. And I thought it didn’t know the things I loathed, , it could never know. It was clean – clean in the absolute sense, because it had no capacity to conceive of the world’s ugliness. ”
